"I don't know why, but I just winked at that guy"

We've had two fantastic days in Venice. Muolto bene. First the negatrons: our dinner last night was disgusting. And for this, we blame our incorrectly advertised walkie talkies which are supposed to have a range of five miles...and in fact have a range of five feet. So Liza, E-Roc and I ventured out, found a delicious restaurant, and then radioed the gals at the hotel to come meet us....then had to basically back track to the hotel for us to hear us, and at that point we were ready to eat at Burger King. We were sat in the back room of the restaurant all by ourselves, and the waiter was playing the Akon cd and singing along (is this Mike and the Mechanics?). It was all salvaged though when "Total Eclipse of the Heart" came on and we had a scream-at-the-top-of-your-lungs sing-a-long. Kind of surprising that when we left there was no one left in the restaurant.

When we got home, there was an episode of Gossip Girl on in Italian. We couldnt understand what they were saying, but we had an excellent time recapping what happened in that particular episode. For those who are interested, it was the one after everyone finds out that Blair and Chuck slept together and she is a pariah (at the height of the Jenny/Blair war) and the one right before Georgina appears when she sends Serena really crazy gifts (like a gram of Cocaine) and she thinks it's Chuck who is doing it. It's probably one of the best. But...I digress.

Then there was today. We made our way over to Murano, which is an island in the lagoon where they make all the world-famous glass products. We had a picnic of cheese, ham, bread and wine on a random dock and then checked out some of the glass factories. Liza asked one of the purveyors where we could see a glass-blowing demonstration, and he told us they only do those during the week BUT THEN he gave us a whole tour of the factory that was hella sick. Ask any of the five of us to tell you how glass is blown (that's what she said) and we'll tell ya. Oh yessiree we will.

After Murano, we went to our first and last Venice Museum: The Peggy Guggenheim Museum. It's basically the only place in this country to see modern art, and they make you pay for it. Peggy is Solomon's niece and basically introduced America to European Art. It was cool, but 12 Euro (which is like 2 bottles of prosecco). Our favorite piece of art was in a sculpture in the courtyard of a guy on a horse with a giant erection. It is literally the first thing you see when you walk into this place, and it really sets the tone (kind of like E-Roc farting within the first five minutes of checking into the hotel). We finished up there and stopped and had a drink near the Accademia bridge. The bar, the Corner Pub, had "Trivial Pursuit: Genius," which of course, LJ insisted that we play. I opened it up and it was in Italian. After she got the first question wrong she said, "it's not possible," and we moved on. Next place we found was like a wine store where you could just buy a bottle and have 1 euro chichetti's (like tapas) that were absolutely delicious. It was awesome until 25 New York City Jewish grandmothers came in (obviously also following Rick Steve's advice). The ring leader of the group turns around and yells, "RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU WANT A SPRTIZER!" We got the F out of there real quick, are now back at the hotel having more prosecco, packing up for Florence, and talking about ghetto DC neighborhoods. It's kind of like being in America. Except way more awesome.

So overall, Venice has been amazing. It is just absolutely gorgeous. It is, like the guidebooks say, kind of like DisneyWorld because it's over run by tourists. But the city is just a delight to be in, and I say that without any irony. We are all sad to leave our hotel (where the slippers are fucking sick), but we must introduce the rest of Italy to the true meaning of the word "dance party."